Hello web surfers. So, it’s Sunday, the laundry’s in the machine, my wrists are sore from excessive painting, and my body wills time to stop, preventing work from capturing me once again for five days of toil. Since I can’t prevent Father Time from pissing on my head, I figured I’d use my time wisely and write a blog post.
Recent Battle Recap
A buddy from my now not-very-local Games Workshop needed to test his army list for Adepticon, so I volunteered to be his punching bag so that he could test combos and practice his boastful, yet trying to be sincere, “sportsmanship smile”. In all honesty, I wasn’t expecting much out of the game; as everyone who knows me knows (and if you don’t know me, HI! I’m Brad), I build all of my armies with fluff in mind, not necessarily great combos. I’m about as competitive as a mouse already down the gullet of a snake…I just lay back, think about all the cheese I’ve ever eaten, and let things fall as they may. But I don’t lie down, either! I’m a dad gum Rocky Balboa of tabletop gaming, except I don’t win every match. In fact, I have quite a few fail moments.
This was the first game I fielded all of my painted Chaos models. You see, my wife has a very ba…wait, she reads this…great, amazing, gives-me-special feelings rule that I can’t buy new models unless I have my previous models painted. Honestly, it keeps me from having a metric crap ton of unpainted minis around my desk, and keeps my spending in line. If it wasn’t for “the rule”, it’d look like the damned last scene of Raiders of the Lost Ark.
After adding a few upgrades, I hit 1,500 points, just the amount of Dave’s tourney army. Oh ya, I was playing Dave. He fielded a Necron / Grey Knight army and won first turn. To get an idea of how the game went for me…
Yep, that bad. I was sore, and wanted to go home. I’m still sitting on my donut pillow. All joking aside, it went a lot better than I thought. I survived till the top of turn five, and decided it was time to call it quits, as I had only a Helbrute left on the board. I did have him on the ropes a couple of times, causing a single bead of sweat to fall from his well-manicured hair, but not for long. My Chaos Lord managed to wipe his Destroyer Lord off the table without a scratch (DAMN! I just realized I forgot my Chaos Boon of rerolling failed armor saves…Chaos players should really bring paper and pens with them), which was satisfying. Due to some lucky dice rolls, my Obliterators managed to rip apart a Dreadknight in one round of shooting and wound another one twice before dying, as well as blow up a Razorback. Lastly, my Heldrake sent a Grey Knight squad to meet their Emperor. In return, Dave tabled me. Le sigh.
No matter what, I had a great time. My army performed well while having quite a few glaring problems (no anti-air fire to speak of, a couple of “why the hell are you using that piece of crap” units), so I consider it a moral victory. I’m pretty notorious in the shop for finding moral victories in my games. In fact, I consider finding moral victories in every situation a moral victory. Optimism is great. My glass is always half full, half full of happy.
Dude Den Cabinet
One of my favorite accents in my dude den is my display cabinet for my models. It’s nothing fancy, just a small Ikea case that I bled over. I seriously think Ikea furniture was designed by Jigsaw, as it’s complicated, causes immense pain, and features dozens of screws.
The biggest problem with the case is there aren’t any lights, but who gives a hoot! It’s a damn glass case full of my models! I talk sweet nothings into its see-through panels every night. Love, ladies and gentlemen. Love. To see blurry ass photos of my entire Alpha Legion Chaos Space Marine army inside the case, head over to my Warhammer 40K gallery.
I don’t give a hell if I’m 12-years-old in my brain place, this lake is essentially named booby poop. Lake Booby Poop. “Guys, let’s go fishing at Lake Booby Poop.”
Disciples of Caliban
While these models are also sitting in my Warhammer 40K gallery, I couldn’t help but to show at least pictures here. These are a little side project for my Black Templars, a bunch of shooty marines to back up their close combat erections. Within 21 days, I’ve managed to paint 10 tactical marines and my Company Master (yes, that’s them below, so be gentle). Not bad, if I do say so myself. That’s almost 4 a week mutha sucka. All I have left are five Terminators and three Bikes. Of course, then I’m moving onto a Stormraven and new Black Templars Marshal, followed closely by my big summer project, the Loken vs. Abaddon diarama from Forgeworld, a model that both excites me sexually, yet scares me. Anyways, check out the pics below for my latest work.
P.S. I know they’re not based. I think I’m going to order some from Fantascape, but I haven’t quite made up my mind which ones.
Did I mention that this lake is pretty much Lake Booby Poop?
I think that’ll wrap it up for today, folks. Keep your hammers swinging and your heads up, just probably not at the same time. Nothing worse than catching your head in your own hammer swing.
To Do: Discuss a Recent Game, Post Model Pictures, Giggle at “Titicaca”